Congratulations! You are not ideal!
Its ridiculous to require to be ideal anyway. But then, everybody's ridiculous sometimes, except ideal people. You know what ideal is.? Ideal is not drinking or eating or speaking or moving a muscle or making even the teensiest mistake. Ideal is never doing anything wrong which means never doing anything at all.
Ideal is uninteresting! So you are not ideal! Amazing! Have fun! Eat things that give you bad breath! Trip over your own shoelaces! Laugh! Let someone else laugh at you! Ideal people never do any of those things. All they do is sit around and sip tea/coffee and think about how ideal they are. But they are not one-hundred-percent ideal anyway. You ought to see them when they get the hiccups!
You can drink pickle juice and imitate gorillas and do daft dances and sing dull songs and wear comic hats and be as imperfect as you and still be a lovely person.
Lovely people are hard to find nowadays. And they are much more fun than ideal people any day of the week...
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